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depressing day

 


I am hungry and tired without reason. I avoid opening my Facebook and Instagram because everyone looks so happy with families and taking pictures together with their pretty clothes, while I sit here feeling numb and confused.

Yes, not all people love Eid al-Fitr. I don't. One of the reasons why I want to leave this country. It's one of the most depressing days in a year.

I feel awful because I feel this way. I do enjoy Eid at times when I have a good company and conversations, but most of the time I don't have these. I don't really eat, either.

Most of the time I wish I were exactly like everyone else; had a happy family, had children and spouse, loved going to other people's houses and welcomed people to my house and get busy with a smile on my face. I bet my mother wishes all these, too.

The saddest part is I don't know what to do. This cycle will repeat itself in the next years. This is why I want to leave so badly.

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