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dear life

 


Going back to work after more than a week having annual leave is miserable. Every time I take my leave, I always thought of doing something that I love, like practicing my violin, completing my paint-by-number painting that I still haven't started, go jogging outside in the evening, etc. etc.

I was also thinking about quitting my job and not renewing my contract. I have been talking about this for a while and it's tiring me up. I am hoping the company would not renew my contract so I don't have to make up 101 reasons for my mom on why I have to quit my job.

Nothing is certain, though. I am trying to stop negative thinking, y'know. I am trying to make my mind more open and positive, however it's easier said than done. I think I don't contribute anything towards my job, my resume sucks and no employer wants to at least call me for interview.

I just want to do well. I just want to make myself feel proud. I don't hate my life, I just hope I know what to do to improve my life and myself.

I also miss travelling so much. And Oggy, too. I still have her meds, I don't know why I haven't thrown it away. Sometimes I heard her sweet voice, at one time I called my other cat by her name.

Dear Life, please help me to get better. Please help me achieving my ambition to work on my own feet. Small stall or business is okay, too. As long as I get my own income. No need for resumes, clocking hours or waste-of-time meetings anymore. Amin.

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